For You

I don't know who you were.
I don't know what you were doing, or even thinking.
But if you can hear me you have haunted me. And I'm sorry I saw you...like that. No ones fate should have been yours. You have changed me, but it's for the better. Things happen for a reason and things happen from other things. I didn't know your name. And it's horrible I didn't know you when you were alive. I have sacrificed a lot. And you a life. But I'm okay. I am still struggling and probably always will be. But I'm okay. Because of you I have learned to live life to the fullest. And I am. I'm going to live and be heard. Maybe you did. Maybe you were at your happiest, but I will never know that. I just want to find my happiness. I don't know what it is, but I know it's out there somewhere. I can feel the space where its going to fill. I'm not gonna give up my life till I find it. I'm not going back to the dark. I will work for this. I learned not to take life for granted anymore. I have grown into a young woman. I have seen the darkest days and I have been in the breath of death. Even my own. But look at me now. I am still here. I am bright too. I have smiled and cried from laughing. How? I sometimes ask myself. How am I still here? But I am. I have been given a chance to live. It was given to me when I was born. But I never grasped it till now. Till I saw you there. Till I realized it all could leave. Everything could leave. I could leave. I want life and I'm living it. I am crying because I have forgotten the day I left fresh water. What I felt. And it feels so right. I am not whole. But time will heal that. I deserve happiness. Everyone does. And that's all I want. And I have it...Love. I have love in my heart. For my family for my friends. I love and I am loved. And that people is what is keeping me alive. That's why I know that my happiness is love. One day I will find love and one day my love will grow. And that is what I am living for. For love. For me. For them. That's all I need. So thank you whoever you are for making me realize this. If it's God if its me of if its the man who I do not know. Thank you for my suffering that made me strong. Thank you for not giving up on me. And thank you for blessing me with love. Thank you for life. Thank you for my familty for my friends. For all my animals. For the seasons. For the sun. For the rain. for music. For my future nephew to come. For me. Thank you for giving me the blessing to live. And I will. Thank you.